wednesday_whimsy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wednesday_whimsy) wrote2009-03-15 06:07 pm
wednesday_whimsy) wrote2009-03-15 06:07 pm
Procrastinating
By midnight, my personal target for my big bang fic is supposed to be 11500 words, just to keep me on track. But as I haven't touched it for almost three weeks it's unlikely that that is going to happen. Instead of working on it (3 weeks! I'm actually scared to look at it!) I'm looking at all the stuff I started and didn't finish. Most of it is Panic stuff, with one Pete/Patrick that I wanted to read so badly but don't think I'm good enough to pull it off.
So beneath the cut is a lot of fic that will probably never see the light of day. Or at least not for a good while.
Five Fics I want to write
I love Regency fics. I love the period. I love the literature from that time. The clothes. The music. The dancing. I want to see bandom boys in breeches and tail coats and cravats. I want them to ride horses and dance and have repressed sexual urges for inappropriate people. Or, to put this thing I started in some context...
Viscount Brendon Urie has gone to London for the Season with orders from his father to find a suitable girl to marry. He is staying with a friend of his mother, Mrs Smith; mother of Captain Spencer Smith who was recently wounded in battle in on continent and is returning home. Brendon finds more things in London to interest him than finding a wife and reports of his wild behaviour soon reach the ears of his parents, who promptly dispatch Brendon's old friend and valet, Jon Walker, to talk some sense into him.
Jon returned from his morning ride to find the house in an uproar.
Tom met him at the kitchen door with a grave face and quiet tone.
"Her Ladyship has taken to her bed. His Lordship is locked in his study. He left instruction for you to go to him as soon as you returned."
Jon hurried through the house, knowing only too well the sort of circumstance that would cause the Countess to retreat to her room. He prayed the the situation was not dire. He gave a sharp knock to the study door and entered on command.
"My Lord." He bowed politely and advanced towards the desk on the other side of the room. "You sent for me?"
The Earl sat angled way from his desk, staring out through the windows overlooking the rose garden. "Yes, thank you Walker." He said no more and Jon stood silently, watching and waiting.
"You know my son well don't you Jon?"
John was visibly startled by the informality of the address. No one in the family, not even Brendon, had called him Jon since he came of age. "I like to think I did at one time My Lord."
"That's more than I do, at any rate." The Earl sighed and turned to face Jon head on. "According to Mrs Smith, he is running wild. Drinking, gambling. She implied no end of debauchery and while it seems that the family name is not yet ruined, it shan't remain intact for much longer if he continues to act in this despicable manner."
Jon had been expecting considerably worse than this. At least, as far as he could see, the situation was still salvageable.
"Jon, I need you to go to London. You are Brendon's oldest friend and the only person I trust to make him see sense. You must persuade him to settle down, to choose a wife, to do his duty."
It was no more than Jon had imagined. He stifled a smile and gave a nod of understanding. "As you wish My Lord."
When I was working at my last job a very attractive man who worked there needed to find a new place to live. And I had such a ridiculous crush on him I thought about offering him my room, just so he would be living with me. (Shut up, I didn't actually do it.) That insane idea produced this fic, wherein Ryan is lonely and bad with people, Brendon is in an awkward position and Spencer and Jon love each other but won't admit it.
Ryan Ross worked hard to maintain a calm and cool personality every moment of his life .
It had served him well him in high school where pretending not to care was as valid a choice as pretending to fit in. College had come and gone and by the time he reached permanent employment it was difficult to escape the character he had created for himself.
He would smile politely, work hard and never cause a fuss. He avoided confrontation and, because it was inevitably easier, he avoided all staff social functions.
To everyone he worked with he was an enigma. The quiet kid in the corner. The boring guy who wore a scarf instead of a tie.
Ryan was happy with this. They were his colleagues not his friends.
Yes Ryan was perfectly content.
Until Brendon.
--
Brendon Urie, Ryan had decided within five minutes of meeting him, was everything Ryan wasn't. He was loud and exuberant and had no concept of personal space.
Ryan avoided him wherever possible.
--
The door to the apartment slammed closed and seconds later Ryan fell awkwardly into Spencer's lap. Spencer, who had been working from home and not watching You Tube all day, thank you Ryan, only just managed to move his laptop in time.
"Work sucks."
Spencer patted Ryan on the shoulder like the good concerned friend he was before unceremoniously dumping him onto the floor.
"I know. What do you want for dinner?"
"Spencer," Ryan whined, staring forlornly up at him. "Feel sorry for me."
"Everyone's job sucks," Spencer said as he filled a pan with water for the pasta. "It's work. It's what you have to do to enjoy the rest of your life."
Ryan sighed. "Well then the rest of my life sucks too."
Spencer rolled his eyes. "Maybe it wouldn't suck so much if you actually tried to make friends."
"I don't need friends. I have you."
It would probably have been funny, Spencer thought, if Ryan didn't actually believe that.
--
"Ryan Ross!"
Ryan jumped and then winced as hot coffee splashed onto his hand. He felt himself start to blush as he turned the find Brendon smiling at him from the doorway of the break room.
"We haven't talked in forever."
Ryan wracked his brain to think of any time in the last year that they had said more than five words to each other.
"How're you?"
Brendon was still smiling at him, which had to be a mistake, since Ryan had been staring at him with his mouth open like some sort of demented fish for the entire encounter.
"That's a nice scarf," Brendon said, reaching out to touch it. Ryan stepped awkwardly out of the way, clutching his cup of coffee to his chest.
"I have to get back to work," he mumbled as he edged past Brendon and hurried back to his desk.
--
Spencer looked ready to die laughing. Ryan was prepared to grant his wish.
"It's not funny."
Jon bit his lip as Spencer dissolved into giggles again. "No Ryan, it's not funny. We're sorry."
Spencer shook his head, now doubled over in mirth. Ryan kicked him.
Jon was Spencer's "friend". Ryan always used the air quotes, unless Jon was around because Jon was cool and air quotes really weren't. Still, Spencer refused to refer to Jon as boyfriend since, technically, they weren't dating
"It's just a casual thing," Spencer had tried to explain after he'd introduced Jon the first time. "It's not serious."
After three years of exclusivity, Ryan thought that Spencer was full of crap.
"Have you thought about actually having a conversation with this guy?" Spencer asked when he finally stopped laughing.
"What would I say to him?"
"How are you? How's work? Would you like to get a coffee sometime?"
"I'm not asking him out on a date."
"You really should," Jon piped up, sharing a smile with Spencer.
"It's not like that. I don't..."
"Yes," Spencer interrupted decisively. "Yes you really do."
--
Ryan was no good at casual conversation. That was one of the many reasons he avoided people. Spencer was the only person that Ryan knew how to talk to. Even Jon, who Ryan liked to consider his friend, was only there because of Spencer.
"Hey Ryan." Brendon stopped by his desk almost as soon as Ryan had sat down. "Coffee?"
"Huh?"
Brendon smiled. "I'm going to make coffee. Would you like some?"
It took a few moments for Ryan's brain to catch up with the conversation, and another few to get his mouth to work. Brendon waited, leaning against the desk, smiling to himself as though Ryan wasn't behaving like a crazy person.
"I would love some coffee," Ryan eventually managed to force out. "White, no..."
"No sugar," Brendon finished, stepping away from the desk finally. "I know."
--
It settled into a routine after a while. Brendon would bring him coffee and stay to chat. Ryan would pretend he didn't care whether Brendon was there or not.
--
Brendon collapsed into the chair at the desk next to Ryan's with a heavy sigh. Ryan looked down, surprised, as Brendon sighed a second time and leaned forward to rest his forehead on Ryan's shoulder.
"Ryan. My life if over Ryan Ross."
"Why is your life over?"
"The guy I'm sharing my apartment with is getting married." Brendon rolled his head to the side, but left it leaning on Ryan's shoulder. He started to pick invisible lint off Ryan's jacket. "Apparently I don't fit into the new domestic arrangement."
Ryan bit his lip to stop himself smiling. "How could that be?"
"I don't know!" Brendon exclaimed emphatically as he sat up again. "I'm friendly, affectionate and most importantly, house-trained."
This time Ryan couldn't stop the smile. Brendon grinned back.
"I don't suppose you happen to have a room to spare do you?"
--
"You did what?"
"I had a brain spasm."
"Ryan..."
"Spence, come on, it won't be that bad. It's just until he finds a place for himself."
"Why did you tell him we were dating? Why couldn't you just have offered him the sofa?"
"He asked for a room. I said I had a room. It's not my fault Spencer. I get confused. His face confuses me."
"You are the weirdest person I have ever met."
"You were the one who said I needed to make friends."
"And lying about dating me to get a guy you have a crush on to move in with you is a good way to do that?"
"Just help me out here. I'll tell him the truth I just need some time. You'll be helping me be a better person."
I love Bid TV. It's one of the best TV stations around. It's utterly hilarious. And the last time![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
doublefourtime was here (or maybe the time before that) we watched Bid TV and talked about them selling fluffy pink flip-flops and how Jon would like those. And how maybe Spencer is a bit of an insomniac who sits up late watching shopping channels and buys things anonymously.
Four nights in a row, Spencer had been unable to get more than an hour's sleep. He had spent each evening staring at the top of his bunk running Haley's words around his head.
"... not spontaneous enough... I need fun Spencer... can't you be silly just once... it's not working..."
It's not working.
Spencer sighed and rolled out of bed. Clearly this wasn't working. He needed to do something. He needed something to help him sleep. He'd been snapping at the others more than usual. Ryan, he knew, was one wrong sentence away from sitting him down for a "talk".
He stumbled into the kitchen, trying to make as little noise as possible. The last thing he needed was Ryan's advice or Brendon's buoyancy or Jon's... well, Jon.
Flopping down onto the couch he switched on the TV and flicked around aimlessly. Infomercial, rerun, infomercial, awful movie, rerun...
Home Shopping Network.
Spencer tucked a cushion under his head and yawned. Stupid people selling stupid things in the most stupid way was exactly what he needed.
A fine example being the flip-flop slippers being sold this very second. In pink of all colours.
Jon would like those, Spencer thought absently. He needed slippers.
Late last year I was waiting near York Minster, where a wedding was taking place. Everyone was arriving and some funny things happened and I started thinking about a wedding day and recasting various people with people from bandom.
Pete and Ashlee are getting married. Patrick has to make sure it all goes off without a hitch, preferably without going crazy. Ryan is having problems writing his speech. Vicky kind of wants to get married. And Spencer really wants to have sex.
00.00
Spencer’s phone shrilled loudly in the darkness at two minutes past midnight.
“Fuck,” he groaned as he jerked and Jon raised his head from Spencer’s lap. “Don’t stop!”
Jon wiped at his mouth and sat back in the passenger seat. “Answer your phone.”
“Fuck,” Spencer said again as he covered himself and wriggled until he found his phone. “You had better be dying Ryan.”
“What rhymes with eternal?”
Spencer switched off his phone without another word and looked hopefully at Jon, who shook his head.
“Fine,” Spencer spat as he started the car. “Will you at least jerk me off if I let you have the first shower?”
00.25
“… colonel, journal, kernel…”
Brendon loved Google.
“Something I can use in a speech,” Ryan said. He sounded tired. He probably needed coffee, Brendon thought as he took another sip of his own and continued listing.
“… external, fraternal, infernal, internal…”
“Brendon are you even listening to me?”
“Why does it have to rhyme anyway? It’s a wedding toast, not an epic poem.”
Brendon knew Ryan knew he was right. He also knew that made it more likely that Ryan was about to hang up on him.
“Maternal, paternal, nocturnal…”
01.10
“Patrick?”
Patrick knows, he knows that it makes him truly shitty best friend, but he pretends not to hear Pete anyway. He’s going to need all the sleep he can get for tomorrow.
“Patrick!” Pete says again, loudly this time, knowing it will wake him.
“What?” Patrick groans, rolling onto his side to find Pete staring at him, wide-eyed.
“Can you believe I’m getting married tomorrow?”
Honestly Patrick can’t, but he knows what Pete needs to hear right now is anything but the truth.
“Of course.”
And actually, the marriage part notwithstanding, Pete and Ashlee do in fact make perfect sense. Pete has never been as happy than he’s been with her and that’s enough to make Patrick believe this is the right thing for them to do.
“I love her,” Pete says simply, as though he has to explain himself. As though Patrick didn’t know that already.
Patrick nods and smiles and pats Pete’s shoulder. “Good. That’s great. I’m glad. Sleep now please?”
Pete smiles and nods, curling his arm around Patrick’s waist and drifting off to sleep immediately.
04.40
Vicky sat in bed, absently smoking a cigarette, staring at the bridesmaid dress that was hanging on the wardrobe door.
She glanced down once at Gabe and sighed.
05.00
Ashlee woke to Jessica snoring beside her and promptly fell back to sleep.
06.10
Joe's alarm buzzed twice before he slapped it off and rolled out of bed.
He had a plan and he was sticking to it. Coffee, shower, breakfast, get dressed, drive to Pete's. Patrick was in charge of all plans after that.
He passed Andy, sitting cross-legged on the living room floor with his eyes closed, as he made his way to the kitchen.
"Mornin'," he mumbled around a yawn. "Did you sleep okay?"
"On the world's most uncomfortable couch?" Andy smiled and finally looked around at Joe. "I did actually."
Joe nodded and flicked on the coffee machine. "Awesome."
07.30
Ryan was still wearing his boxers and the old My Chem t-shirt he slept in when he answered the door to Brendon. He had a piece of toast clutched in one hand.
"Did you sleep at all?" Brendon asked as he stepped past Ryan and placed the brightly wrapped present he was carrying down on the hall table.
Ryan shrugged. "I must have." He took a bite of toast and led Brendon through to the kitchen. "Are you hungry?" He didn't wait for an answer; just pushed two slices of bread into the toaster and poured Brendon some coffee.
"I don't think I've ever seen you in a suit before. You look good."
Brendon wasn't entirely sure how he was supposed to react, so gave a half smile and half shrug.
Ryan continued to stare at him and Brendon was determined not get his hopes up, fidgeting under Ryan's gaze until finally Ryan's eyes went comically wide and he squeaked.
"Shit!" Ryan shouted as he ran from the kitchen. "I left the iron on."
08.08
Jon pressed Spencer up against the shower wall and grinned.
"I told you my plan was better."
08.15
Ashlee sat perfectly still as the stylist finished pinning her hair.
"You look beautiful," Jessica cooed from across the room and Ashlee met her sister's eyes in the mirror with a smile.
"I'm getting married today," she said with a giggle at the end. She bit her lip. Hopefully soon she'd be able to say something else. Anything else.
09.00
Pete heard Patrick call him down for breakfast and nodded to himself. "Yeah, two minutes."
"No, now Pete."
It was like living with his mom again. Pete said as much. He imagined Patrick flipping him off and grinned.
"I was just checking my email," Pete explained when he eventually sat down opposite Patrick at the kitchen table.
"It's your wedding day. Surely you an manage one day without it."
Pete shrugged. "If she changed her mind she would have emailed."
Patrick stared at him for a moment and then silently pushed a plate of pancakes towards him.
I didn't get much past the first paragraph so I don't feel there's any point in posting it.
It's Patrick's thirtieth birthday and just another boring day for him. His mother is the only person who sends him a card and he spends the evening in a local bar with his brother. He has no friends, a job he hates and a tiny one room apartment that doesn't allow pets. He goes to bed that night wishing his life was different; wishing he'd done things differently in the past. If he was sixteen again, he wouldn't be the quiet loner he'd been in high-school. If he was sixteen again he would speak up in class and try out for the choir and the band and he would walk right up to Pete Wentz and say... something. Anything. When he wakes up the next morning he's in his old bed at his parents' house and he is indeed sixteen again.
So beneath the cut is a lot of fic that will probably never see the light of day. Or at least not for a good while.
Five Fics I want to write
- Regency AU
I love Regency fics. I love the period. I love the literature from that time. The clothes. The music. The dancing. I want to see bandom boys in breeches and tail coats and cravats. I want them to ride horses and dance and have repressed sexual urges for inappropriate people. Or, to put this thing I started in some context...
Viscount Brendon Urie has gone to London for the Season with orders from his father to find a suitable girl to marry. He is staying with a friend of his mother, Mrs Smith; mother of Captain Spencer Smith who was recently wounded in battle in on continent and is returning home. Brendon finds more things in London to interest him than finding a wife and reports of his wild behaviour soon reach the ears of his parents, who promptly dispatch Brendon's old friend and valet, Jon Walker, to talk some sense into him.
Jon returned from his morning ride to find the house in an uproar.
Tom met him at the kitchen door with a grave face and quiet tone.
"Her Ladyship has taken to her bed. His Lordship is locked in his study. He left instruction for you to go to him as soon as you returned."
Jon hurried through the house, knowing only too well the sort of circumstance that would cause the Countess to retreat to her room. He prayed the the situation was not dire. He gave a sharp knock to the study door and entered on command.
"My Lord." He bowed politely and advanced towards the desk on the other side of the room. "You sent for me?"
The Earl sat angled way from his desk, staring out through the windows overlooking the rose garden. "Yes, thank you Walker." He said no more and Jon stood silently, watching and waiting.
"You know my son well don't you Jon?"
John was visibly startled by the informality of the address. No one in the family, not even Brendon, had called him Jon since he came of age. "I like to think I did at one time My Lord."
"That's more than I do, at any rate." The Earl sighed and turned to face Jon head on. "According to Mrs Smith, he is running wild. Drinking, gambling. She implied no end of debauchery and while it seems that the family name is not yet ruined, it shan't remain intact for much longer if he continues to act in this despicable manner."
Jon had been expecting considerably worse than this. At least, as far as he could see, the situation was still salvageable.
"Jon, I need you to go to London. You are Brendon's oldest friend and the only person I trust to make him see sense. You must persuade him to settle down, to choose a wife, to do his duty."
It was no more than Jon had imagined. He stifled a smile and gave a nod of understanding. "As you wish My Lord."
- The "I Don't Know How to Keep it Going" AU
When I was working at my last job a very attractive man who worked there needed to find a new place to live. And I had such a ridiculous crush on him I thought about offering him my room, just so he would be living with me. (Shut up, I didn't actually do it.) That insane idea produced this fic, wherein Ryan is lonely and bad with people, Brendon is in an awkward position and Spencer and Jon love each other but won't admit it.
Ryan Ross worked hard to maintain a calm and cool personality every moment of his life .
It had served him well him in high school where pretending not to care was as valid a choice as pretending to fit in. College had come and gone and by the time he reached permanent employment it was difficult to escape the character he had created for himself.
He would smile politely, work hard and never cause a fuss. He avoided confrontation and, because it was inevitably easier, he avoided all staff social functions.
To everyone he worked with he was an enigma. The quiet kid in the corner. The boring guy who wore a scarf instead of a tie.
Ryan was happy with this. They were his colleagues not his friends.
Yes Ryan was perfectly content.
Until Brendon.
--
Brendon Urie, Ryan had decided within five minutes of meeting him, was everything Ryan wasn't. He was loud and exuberant and had no concept of personal space.
Ryan avoided him wherever possible.
--
The door to the apartment slammed closed and seconds later Ryan fell awkwardly into Spencer's lap. Spencer, who had been working from home and not watching You Tube all day, thank you Ryan, only just managed to move his laptop in time.
"Work sucks."
Spencer patted Ryan on the shoulder like the good concerned friend he was before unceremoniously dumping him onto the floor.
"I know. What do you want for dinner?"
"Spencer," Ryan whined, staring forlornly up at him. "Feel sorry for me."
"Everyone's job sucks," Spencer said as he filled a pan with water for the pasta. "It's work. It's what you have to do to enjoy the rest of your life."
Ryan sighed. "Well then the rest of my life sucks too."
Spencer rolled his eyes. "Maybe it wouldn't suck so much if you actually tried to make friends."
"I don't need friends. I have you."
It would probably have been funny, Spencer thought, if Ryan didn't actually believe that.
--
"Ryan Ross!"
Ryan jumped and then winced as hot coffee splashed onto his hand. He felt himself start to blush as he turned the find Brendon smiling at him from the doorway of the break room.
"We haven't talked in forever."
Ryan wracked his brain to think of any time in the last year that they had said more than five words to each other.
"How're you?"
Brendon was still smiling at him, which had to be a mistake, since Ryan had been staring at him with his mouth open like some sort of demented fish for the entire encounter.
"That's a nice scarf," Brendon said, reaching out to touch it. Ryan stepped awkwardly out of the way, clutching his cup of coffee to his chest.
"I have to get back to work," he mumbled as he edged past Brendon and hurried back to his desk.
--
Spencer looked ready to die laughing. Ryan was prepared to grant his wish.
"It's not funny."
Jon bit his lip as Spencer dissolved into giggles again. "No Ryan, it's not funny. We're sorry."
Spencer shook his head, now doubled over in mirth. Ryan kicked him.
Jon was Spencer's "friend". Ryan always used the air quotes, unless Jon was around because Jon was cool and air quotes really weren't. Still, Spencer refused to refer to Jon as boyfriend since, technically, they weren't dating
"It's just a casual thing," Spencer had tried to explain after he'd introduced Jon the first time. "It's not serious."
After three years of exclusivity, Ryan thought that Spencer was full of crap.
"Have you thought about actually having a conversation with this guy?" Spencer asked when he finally stopped laughing.
"What would I say to him?"
"How are you? How's work? Would you like to get a coffee sometime?"
"I'm not asking him out on a date."
"You really should," Jon piped up, sharing a smile with Spencer.
"It's not like that. I don't..."
"Yes," Spencer interrupted decisively. "Yes you really do."
--
Ryan was no good at casual conversation. That was one of the many reasons he avoided people. Spencer was the only person that Ryan knew how to talk to. Even Jon, who Ryan liked to consider his friend, was only there because of Spencer.
"Hey Ryan." Brendon stopped by his desk almost as soon as Ryan had sat down. "Coffee?"
"Huh?"
Brendon smiled. "I'm going to make coffee. Would you like some?"
It took a few moments for Ryan's brain to catch up with the conversation, and another few to get his mouth to work. Brendon waited, leaning against the desk, smiling to himself as though Ryan wasn't behaving like a crazy person.
"I would love some coffee," Ryan eventually managed to force out. "White, no..."
"No sugar," Brendon finished, stepping away from the desk finally. "I know."
--
It settled into a routine after a while. Brendon would bring him coffee and stay to chat. Ryan would pretend he didn't care whether Brendon was there or not.
--
Brendon collapsed into the chair at the desk next to Ryan's with a heavy sigh. Ryan looked down, surprised, as Brendon sighed a second time and leaned forward to rest his forehead on Ryan's shoulder.
"Ryan. My life if over Ryan Ross."
"Why is your life over?"
"The guy I'm sharing my apartment with is getting married." Brendon rolled his head to the side, but left it leaning on Ryan's shoulder. He started to pick invisible lint off Ryan's jacket. "Apparently I don't fit into the new domestic arrangement."
Ryan bit his lip to stop himself smiling. "How could that be?"
"I don't know!" Brendon exclaimed emphatically as he sat up again. "I'm friendly, affectionate and most importantly, house-trained."
This time Ryan couldn't stop the smile. Brendon grinned back.
"I don't suppose you happen to have a room to spare do you?"
--
"You did what?"
"I had a brain spasm."
"Ryan..."
"Spence, come on, it won't be that bad. It's just until he finds a place for himself."
"Why did you tell him we were dating? Why couldn't you just have offered him the sofa?"
"He asked for a room. I said I had a room. It's not my fault Spencer. I get confused. His face confuses me."
"You are the weirdest person I have ever met."
"You were the one who said I needed to make friends."
"And lying about dating me to get a guy you have a crush on to move in with you is a good way to do that?"
"Just help me out here. I'll tell him the truth I just need some time. You'll be helping me be a better person."
- The Shopping Channel Fic
I love Bid TV. It's one of the best TV stations around. It's utterly hilarious. And the last time
doublefourtime was here (or maybe the time before that) we watched Bid TV and talked about them selling fluffy pink flip-flops and how Jon would like those. And how maybe Spencer is a bit of an insomniac who sits up late watching shopping channels and buys things anonymously.Four nights in a row, Spencer had been unable to get more than an hour's sleep. He had spent each evening staring at the top of his bunk running Haley's words around his head.
"... not spontaneous enough... I need fun Spencer... can't you be silly just once... it's not working..."
It's not working.
Spencer sighed and rolled out of bed. Clearly this wasn't working. He needed to do something. He needed something to help him sleep. He'd been snapping at the others more than usual. Ryan, he knew, was one wrong sentence away from sitting him down for a "talk".
He stumbled into the kitchen, trying to make as little noise as possible. The last thing he needed was Ryan's advice or Brendon's buoyancy or Jon's... well, Jon.
Flopping down onto the couch he switched on the TV and flicked around aimlessly. Infomercial, rerun, infomercial, awful movie, rerun...
Home Shopping Network.
Spencer tucked a cushion under his head and yawned. Stupid people selling stupid things in the most stupid way was exactly what he needed.
A fine example being the flip-flop slippers being sold this very second. In pink of all colours.
Jon would like those, Spencer thought absently. He needed slippers.
- The Wedding AU
Late last year I was waiting near York Minster, where a wedding was taking place. Everyone was arriving and some funny things happened and I started thinking about a wedding day and recasting various people with people from bandom.
Pete and Ashlee are getting married. Patrick has to make sure it all goes off without a hitch, preferably without going crazy. Ryan is having problems writing his speech. Vicky kind of wants to get married. And Spencer really wants to have sex.
00.00
Spencer’s phone shrilled loudly in the darkness at two minutes past midnight.
“Fuck,” he groaned as he jerked and Jon raised his head from Spencer’s lap. “Don’t stop!”
Jon wiped at his mouth and sat back in the passenger seat. “Answer your phone.”
“Fuck,” Spencer said again as he covered himself and wriggled until he found his phone. “You had better be dying Ryan.”
“What rhymes with eternal?”
Spencer switched off his phone without another word and looked hopefully at Jon, who shook his head.
“Fine,” Spencer spat as he started the car. “Will you at least jerk me off if I let you have the first shower?”
00.25
“… colonel, journal, kernel…”
Brendon loved Google.
“Something I can use in a speech,” Ryan said. He sounded tired. He probably needed coffee, Brendon thought as he took another sip of his own and continued listing.
“… external, fraternal, infernal, internal…”
“Brendon are you even listening to me?”
“Why does it have to rhyme anyway? It’s a wedding toast, not an epic poem.”
Brendon knew Ryan knew he was right. He also knew that made it more likely that Ryan was about to hang up on him.
“Maternal, paternal, nocturnal…”
01.10
“Patrick?”
Patrick knows, he knows that it makes him truly shitty best friend, but he pretends not to hear Pete anyway. He’s going to need all the sleep he can get for tomorrow.
“Patrick!” Pete says again, loudly this time, knowing it will wake him.
“What?” Patrick groans, rolling onto his side to find Pete staring at him, wide-eyed.
“Can you believe I’m getting married tomorrow?”
Honestly Patrick can’t, but he knows what Pete needs to hear right now is anything but the truth.
“Of course.”
And actually, the marriage part notwithstanding, Pete and Ashlee do in fact make perfect sense. Pete has never been as happy than he’s been with her and that’s enough to make Patrick believe this is the right thing for them to do.
“I love her,” Pete says simply, as though he has to explain himself. As though Patrick didn’t know that already.
Patrick nods and smiles and pats Pete’s shoulder. “Good. That’s great. I’m glad. Sleep now please?”
Pete smiles and nods, curling his arm around Patrick’s waist and drifting off to sleep immediately.
04.40
Vicky sat in bed, absently smoking a cigarette, staring at the bridesmaid dress that was hanging on the wardrobe door.
She glanced down once at Gabe and sighed.
05.00
Ashlee woke to Jessica snoring beside her and promptly fell back to sleep.
06.10
Joe's alarm buzzed twice before he slapped it off and rolled out of bed.
He had a plan and he was sticking to it. Coffee, shower, breakfast, get dressed, drive to Pete's. Patrick was in charge of all plans after that.
He passed Andy, sitting cross-legged on the living room floor with his eyes closed, as he made his way to the kitchen.
"Mornin'," he mumbled around a yawn. "Did you sleep okay?"
"On the world's most uncomfortable couch?" Andy smiled and finally looked around at Joe. "I did actually."
Joe nodded and flicked on the coffee machine. "Awesome."
07.30
Ryan was still wearing his boxers and the old My Chem t-shirt he slept in when he answered the door to Brendon. He had a piece of toast clutched in one hand.
"Did you sleep at all?" Brendon asked as he stepped past Ryan and placed the brightly wrapped present he was carrying down on the hall table.
Ryan shrugged. "I must have." He took a bite of toast and led Brendon through to the kitchen. "Are you hungry?" He didn't wait for an answer; just pushed two slices of bread into the toaster and poured Brendon some coffee.
"I don't think I've ever seen you in a suit before. You look good."
Brendon wasn't entirely sure how he was supposed to react, so gave a half smile and half shrug.
Ryan continued to stare at him and Brendon was determined not get his hopes up, fidgeting under Ryan's gaze until finally Ryan's eyes went comically wide and he squeaked.
"Shit!" Ryan shouted as he ran from the kitchen. "I left the iron on."
08.08
Jon pressed Spencer up against the shower wall and grinned.
"I told you my plan was better."
08.15
Ashlee sat perfectly still as the stylist finished pinning her hair.
"You look beautiful," Jessica cooed from across the room and Ashlee met her sister's eyes in the mirror with a smile.
"I'm getting married today," she said with a giggle at the end. She bit her lip. Hopefully soon she'd be able to say something else. Anything else.
09.00
Pete heard Patrick call him down for breakfast and nodded to himself. "Yeah, two minutes."
"No, now Pete."
It was like living with his mom again. Pete said as much. He imagined Patrick flipping him off and grinned.
"I was just checking my email," Pete explained when he eventually sat down opposite Patrick at the kitchen table.
"It's your wedding day. Surely you an manage one day without it."
Pete shrugged. "If she changed her mind she would have emailed."
Patrick stared at him for a moment and then silently pushed a plate of pancakes towards him.
- The Time Travel AU
I didn't get much past the first paragraph so I don't feel there's any point in posting it.
It's Patrick's thirtieth birthday and just another boring day for him. His mother is the only person who sends him a card and he spends the evening in a local bar with his brother. He has no friends, a job he hates and a tiny one room apartment that doesn't allow pets. He goes to bed that night wishing his life was different; wishing he'd done things differently in the past. If he was sixteen again, he wouldn't be the quiet loner he'd been in high-school. If he was sixteen again he would speak up in class and try out for the choir and the band and he would walk right up to Pete Wentz and say... something. Anything. When he wakes up the next morning he's in his old bed at his parents' house and he is indeed sixteen again.